Stupid little prayer.

So I haven't found the time to sit down and write how or what I am doing. I'm not swamped with things to do, I'm just not very good at writing so it takes time to put my thoughts into coherent sentences. And that might not even happen. So apologizes beforehand.

From the time I left Los Angeles to the time I got to Thailand, I found myself continuously asking "What the hell was I doing?"  I wasn't excited. I wasn't scared.

I was just sad.

Sad because I was alone. 

Pathetic I know. 

But this was more than just me not wanting to be by myself. I love being by myself: at home, at school.  I wouldn't mind vacationing by myself.

But I was going to be in another country for the first time, not knowing the language, not knowing anyone, and living in housing conditions that I was not used to.  And then I'm expected to teach English, which I have never done, to students who are my age and older.

What the hell was I doing?

Don't call it fear. I wasn't afraid, again, I was just sad.  

I think I had already assumed that I was going to fail at teaching and that no one was going to interact with me.

And so I just really wanted someone there for when this happened. Or that if they were there, it wouldn't happen.

So even if Thailand was shitty, looking back at it would have made it a shared shitty experience.

And shared shitty experiences actually become funny experiences.

Make sense?

So I did the only thing I could do. Prayed.

Prayed that I would stop feeling like this because it was stupid. And then I prayed for other stupid and adolescent things like for people to like me.

But for God, I don't think there are such things as stupid prayers. Maybe stupid people. Just kidding.

God really appreciates our honesty for the little things that we want, even as simple as mines.

The minute that I landed in Thailand, the family that I am staying with treated me as if we already knew each other.

The students are amazing; when I can't communicate with them in Thai, Hmong, or they just tell me to laugh it off because they enjoying laughing with me.

And whenever I think to myself "God, crap I'm alone and have nothing to do", someone comes along and wants to hang out or talk!

And this has happened more than a couple of times.

I have not, for a second, felt "alone" since I have been in Thailand.

Anyways, I'll quickly explain the pictures below!

Los Angeles traffic vs. Bangkok traffic
Bangkok : 1
Los Angeles: 0



You see those clouds, peed like a pregnant woman, never ending!
Had to take cover to the right.

Worship in Thai. Some of them apologized to me for not being able to do worship in English. I told them that it was totally fine because in my fellowship at UCLA, we do praise and worship in different languages all the time. Thanks IV.

 

First day in Khon Kaen, jumped in the trunk of a truck that fitted 10 people.

Entrance to a village.



Went to villages to talk to people about Jesus. Did I mention this was my first day in Khon Kaen.

Worship first. I get nervous talking to people about J, these students weekly go to villages in Thailand to share about J. Amazing.

 

Also offered back and foot massages to the people of the village.

Dirty pond, but had beautiful pink flowers.

The pond belonged to this woman who went and picked it for me. She is an amazing and kind woman. Talked to her with a friend who I just met who was my translator of course.  She is raising a disabled son and a baby in a house the size of my apartment bedroom.

 Took students of the school to bowl.  For the majority of them, this was their first time!

Filipino family who I met at the school.  The family moved to Thailand.  The little boy reminded me of my brother, Daniel.  He is trying to do a peace sign. So Asian >_<

These students keep busy.  Chapel in the morning from 8-9 am. Class until 4 pm. They help clean the school until 5 pm. 1 hour break. And mandatory studying in the library until 9 pm.  That's why Asian people are so smart.

Volleyball during break.  The students are sorta adorable.  They call me "aa-jaan" Kim.  Which means Teacher Kim.  I always have to tell them that "Kim" is fine!